Maddie

This is my baby Maddie. Maddie and I celebrated our 5th anniversary together in September, and I can honestly say that Maddie has presented every conceivable urinary challenge to me that a dog possibly can. Girlfriend has got pissues. She was housetrained when I got her, so that was great. But she has this thing about peeing when she gets excited. For example, when my friend Laura comes over, who Maddie looooooves, she automatically pees. I have to make Laura call ahead when she's on her way, and then reunite them in the back yard. I watch the spectacle and then hose her off, because she usually gets pee all over her hindquarters.

Also, Maddie has an overwhelming fear of the car. She freaks out in the car. I'm talking about loud barking and yiping and hurling herself against windows the entire trip. We have tried drugging her with these pills the vet gave us when we go on trips. Unfortunately, these magical pills also eliminate her pee control. Needless to say, I always have a healthy supply of doggy diapers from PetCo in my house (size small, with a little hole for her tail, and adorned with delightful renderings of puppies chasing butterflies.) We tried the dog "seatbelt" and a cloth muzzle, but she looked a little too much like Hannibal Lecter for my comfort. She managed to "houdini" her way out of it anyway.

Finally, Maddie does this thing we call "spiteful urination". If she is unhappy with me or Gavin, usually when we get back from a trip after boarding her, or if we trim her or scold her, she will pee in our bed, just for funsies. She knows she's not supposed to go there, she has already been outside to pee and it's not an emergency, it's just spite and manipulation. Teaching us a lesson. There is nothing like crawling into bed after a long day only to discover a cold wet spot of pee. Then she looks at me as if to say, " So you thought you were going to hit the sack? How wrong you were. Change those sheets and flip that mattress. I'll just relax over here in the laundry basket." We have learned to keep our bedroom door shut whenever we suspect that we have crossed her.

Pee problems notwithstanding, she is a sweet dog and we love her. She is endlessly entertaining. She loves to chase light and snuggle under the covers. So I guess I can handle her pee problems from time to time. That's what oxyclean is for.