Thanksgiving... check.

Aaaaaand we're back. I'm sitting in front of the TV, surfing the net, bloggin'. I had a great long weekend at the parents' place in Pensacola, so fun, so relaxing, so eaty. Yes, I stuffed my pie hole, thanks for asking. I got to see most of the siblings, and Mom put on a great party, as usual. Thanks for the hospitality, Mom! Here's some pics.



Dad.....



Deda.....

Nikki and Maria....

Regarding the football issue.. the elephant in the room, so to speak: I congratulate those teams that won, and I'll be a good sport. After all, it is just a game. But come on. I mean, let's not beat around the bush. All my nemeses are emerging victorious this year and I needs a hug.

Honestly, I can handle losing but I just wish we weren't so disastrously, off-the-rails bad this year. I'm going to pretend it didn't happen. (Also, please be advised that masturbatory comments by Bama fans are subject to instant deletion if I can't think of a snappy comeback fast enough... which, lets face it, means they are subject to instant deletion. Resist the urge anyway; it's bad football karma. You know who you are.)

I'm taking it better than Maddie. Maddie's a big Auburn fan. She's been to Auburn twice actually, and in her lifetime she has never seen an Iron Bowl that Auburn didn't win. I snapped a pic of her watching the game. This says it all.

Aww, Maddie. There's always next year.

But you know what. It's still great to be an Auburn Tiger. Just the other day, a lawyer friend and I were discussing colleges. This friend attended a smaller private college and she remarked that if she could do it all over again it might have been fun to go somewhere bigger, in a bigger city, with more people, maybe New York, Boston, etc. I replied that if I could do it over a million times I would go to Auburn every single time, and I totally meant it. War Eagle! We'll be back!

What else, what else..... looking ahead, moving on. December is a fun month. Gav and I are going to get our Christmas tree this week! That's always a fun outing, getting our Christmas on. I'll keep you advised. Have a great week everyone!

More fun stuff.

So back to the wedding reception. This fun thing happened while I was there. See if you can picture it, ok? So I'm rustling over to the bathroom and I run into my friends Leah, Katie, and Katherine. Here's how that conversation went:

Me: Hey girls!
L, K, and K: Hey! What up!
Me: Just making a pit stop. Oh, by the way, I'm smacking asses and high fiving tonight, just thought I'd let you know. I just victimized Holly's mom so apparently no one is safe. Heads up.
Leah: Thanks.
Katherine: Ask Bets!
Me: Talk to me.
Leah: There's a big stuffed horse here and I want a picture with it and the museum guy won't let us back there. We thought maybe you could talk him into it.
Me: (not finding this odd in the least) Ladies, I will give it a shot. Where is he?!


(So I rustle on over to the guy behind the desk...rustle rustle).

Me: (flashing smile). Hey there.... Betsy Burgess, nice to see ya. Listen, it has come to my attention that there is a stunning stuffed horse on the premises. We would really love to take a super duper quick picture with said horse. Are you sure there isn't a way we could sneak back there?

30 seconds later...... And then this.

Woo hoo! Fun times. What? We were just horsin' around.

More random thoughts: So there's this thing about me that I don't get. I don't discover fun music until months or even years after everyone else has been enjoying it. This happened with Yeah, In Da Club, anything else by 50 Cent, those Kanye West songs, Ignition, and a bunch of other songs over the years that I don't hear until I get a cd from a friend or I find myself on a dance floor somewhere. This could be because I only listen to soft rock, broadway, or talk radio. Hmmm... I may have solved my own mystery.

Anyway, I am currently obsessed with the song "Low" by Flo Rida, that I heard for the first time ever at K's wedding reception. WTF? You should have seen me. I was like, what...... what is this awesome song? I mean, listen to these lyrics! Ahem:

Shorty had apple bottom jeans (jeans!)
Boots with the fur (with the fur!)
The whole club was looking at her
She hit the floor (she hit the floor!)
Next thing you know
Shorty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low
The baggy sweat pants
And the Reeboks with the straps (with the straps!)
She turned around and gave that big booty a smack (hey! )
She hit the floor (she hit the floor!)
Next thing you know
Shorty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low

GENIUS. And I love the word Shorty. Seriously, I try to use it all the time. So, if you aren't part of the 90% of the population that has been jamming to this song for a while now, check it out!

Wild Weekend in Mobile!

Friends, it was another weekend of world record breaking fun, brought to me in Mobile, AL by my besty from the old days at AU, KRice.

Kristin got married this weekend and well folks, we threw it down. Now, I want you all to know that I personally did not hold back. You should be really proud. It was like I was riding a glorious adrenaline wave of collegiate stamina the whole weekend that violently crashed into the cold wet shore of 29 year-old-ness in the Vibe on the way back east on I-10. I am exhausted. I mean, where do I get off engaging in such tomfoolery at 29 years of age? Cheese and crackers.

Here's me, Sher-bear, Nancy, and Mary at the Rehearsal Dinner, about two hours before things got completely out of control that night. Oww! Hmm... anyhoo....

The following day we spent the whole day getting ready in K's suite. One of my favorite parts of the weekend was getting my hair and makeup done professionally. Holy shat, I love getting pampered like that. My hair actually stayed curly all night long. I’m telling you, people were amazed by the staying power of my curly bouncy hair.

I also enjoyed learning about all the new innovations in the field of hair and makeup artistry. For example, they used this spray-on foundation stuff, and lip gloss and blush that goes on clear and then adjusts to the appropriate color for your face. It’s amazing and a little scary, like it’s artificially intelligent makeup. They also have special new shears that they use to produce layers. Now that’s cutting edge.

Our bridesmaid’s dresses were beautiful and shiny. We are all so shiny in these pics. Also, the fabric of our dresses was kind of noisy when we walked, like that Seinfeld episode where George buys the "loud suit." You could also hear us coming from about 50 yards away, like a herd of beautiful brown shiny cattle. Rustle rustle rustle. (Russell! Shout out, Meg).

At the reception, me, Linds, Holls, and KT:

Holly: WTF Bets, I'm trying to eat. Lindsey: Yeah, really, Bets, she's trying to eat. April: Something's fun over here to my right.

I saw my pal Jeremy; he loves me! This was taken when we were out at our last stop of the evening before passing out. You can't tell, right?

Great weekend! I’m a little distraught that there’s not a planned event in the works for us all to get together again soon, so we’ll have to work on that. I'm feeling the Vegas suggestion, ladies. Let's keep that dialogue going. Miss you, girls!!

In other news, I am loving the "Messin with Sasquatch" commercials. Oh, and I love food and probably should get control of that before Thanksgiving rolls around. Ok, I'm done.

Football and Fair

It was another great weekend for the Burgii! On Saturday, my sis Maria brought her fam over to attend the FSU football game! We had such a great time! Here are some pics:

Me and Maria with the kiddies.......

Anna Grace and Sugarbear.... they have a special blond. Alan and Lori came to the game with us too. Look, I'm Benazhir Bhutto!

ALSO: Gavin and I FINALLY made it to the North Florida Fair after several years of trying to go but always being foiled by previous engagements. This year we went on the very last day. It was fun! We saw real live carnies (small hands, smell like cabbage), ate some fried dough (remind me to author a separate post about obesity in America), and rode some rides. The BEST part, though, was the animals. Pretty much everyone knows I love farm animals. So when Gavin saw the sign that said Petting Zoo, he said, "This can't miss." Right on, baby.

An Alpaca! Goats!
The swings! That's me in the middle, red mittens. Note that I'm clearly the oldest person on the ride.
The whole time I had the song "Have I stayed too long at the fair" stuck in my head. See if you can guess who sings it..... that's right! Barbra. We know me so well.

So this weekend we're headed to Mobile to get KRice married off.... wild times ahead, folks. Stay tuned....

Back from NY!

I'm back from NY! I heart that place. So fun! So many adventures. And of course, one can't go to a big city without encountering a colorful cast of characters. This trip was no exception.

1) New York Nick. Mom struck up a conversation with this character on the plane. He was meeting his girlfriend in NY for the weekend, but was quick to inform us that he had no plans to propose, and in fact, never intended to propose to this woman or any other woman unless she has a good enough job to support him so he can stay home all day instead of working. Charming. And too much information. He talked to my mom the entire flight while she was clearly trying to read her historical romance novel.

I mean really. How is she supposed to concentrate on complex plots involving ripped bodices and dashing men in waistcoats with that inane chatter going on? He also used lots of interesting and unusual hand gestures. Wow. To the Never-to-be-Mrs. New York Nick: this Bud’s for you.

2) Edward the Blue Shuttlebus Driver. Edward drove us to the hotel from the airport. Throughout the whole ride he had this calypso/jazz/love music going really loud, and sang along for everyone in the cab. I still have the song "Rendezvous in Rio" stuck in my head. The music was so ridiculous that I had to google it to see if it wasn't just Edward's weekend band getting free publicity. I discovered that it is real music by a real person. Wow. People will listen to some crap.

3) Emily. One of my roomies from college! She is a real live New Yorker now, and she took Nikki and me OUT on the town while mom dug into her hotel room bed with a pot of tea and candy and called it a night. We had dinner in Times Square and then found ourselves at Vlada's, a trendy “Russian vodka bar” that is home to the hottest gay men in Manhattan. If you know me, you know that a visit to a big city male gay bar is a rare and exotic treat. Guilt-free attention from fun, good-looking guys! This venue is where I made most of my friends on this trip. We were out past two!

Me with Josh. This "one arm straight up" move is quickly becoming my signature. When did that happen?

4) The aforementioned hottest gay men in Manhattan. Shout out!

We also did a lot of fun, touristy stuff. We went to FAO Schwarz to get some toys for Nikki's kids (and saw Bernadette Peters there, singing a capella to the kiddies), we shopped at street vendors and at Tiffany's, we hit Central Park and the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and we saw Wicked. I am now officially re-obsessed with showtunes.

Here is Nikki and I with a NYPD horse in Times Square.

Here we are growling like Kung Fu Tigers.

This is mom in Central Park.

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the trip:

Nikki: They don't have the Ben-10 toys at FAO Schwarz so we have to go to the Toys R'Us in Times Square.

Mom: They have a Toys R'Us in Times Square?
Nikki: Yes; it's a big deal. It's like the "Home of Geoffrey the Giraffe" or something.
Mom: Really? Is he walking around in there?
Nikki: Well, he's not a real giraffe.

Mom: I am SO drunk.

Mom: A $69 minibar charge? I only took a candy bar and a pack of cookies.

Mom: No one is allowed to drop the F-bomb on this trip.

Nikki: You have violated your own rule at least twice.

Mom: Only for clarification purposes.

Nikki: Flipping the bird counts as the F-bomb.

Mom: I brought them because I thought they looked New Yorky. (referring to calf-length leopard-skin boots)

And the best:

Mom: How did you know it was a gay bar?

HA!

Love these girls. So..... who wants to help me plot my return?

Twenty-fine.

That is correct. Today represents the 29th anniversary of my reverse luge into this world, and since this is my first birthday with a blog, I thought I might do a little commemorative post with some fun facts.

1) Lots of things are younger than me that really seem old.

For example, this little number. An Atari, circa 1980. Ancient, just like me.

Or IBM Computers like this one, built in 1979, just like me.

2) 1979 produced lots of pop hits that are now clearly "oldies." For example:

Da Ya Think I'm Sexy, Rod Stewart; Reunited (and it feels so good), Peaches and Herb; I Will Survive, Gloria Gaynor; Y.M.C.A., Village People; Ring My Bell, Anita Ward; The Gambler, Kenny Rogers.

And my personal timeless favorite: You Don't Bring Me Flowers, Barbra Streisand and Neil Diamond.

3) Yay for 1979. It was a great and interesting year for global affairs. The Islamic Revolution in Iran, the implementation of the One Child Policy in China, vicious IRA attacks in Great Britain, and right here at home, President Carter was attacked by a swamp bunny.

Per Wikipedia, Carter had gone fishing in Georgia when the rabbit approached his boat "hissing menacingly, its teeth flashing and nostrils flared and making straight for the president," trying desperately to enter the boat, causing Carter to defend himself with oars.

How hilarious. If anyone was wondering what species I might have been in a former life, I think I have an idea. I did not even know swimming swamp bunnies existed. This one seemed ferocious, with the "nostrils flared" and everything... I wonder if it was rabit.

4) When I popped out, people were walking around in smashing outfits like this. I appreciate that the both the jumpsuit and the leisure suit were available in lime green, mustard, and sky blue.

Wow. We've come a loooong way, folks. Thanks for all the happy birthday wishes!

I could bearly believe it.

So yesterday afternoon, Gavin and I were on our way to a wedding on St. George Island, which is about a two-hour trek from Tallahassee, when we saw a real life BLACK BEAR on the side of the road!

We were on US 98/319, bearing south, when we came upon the bear on the left. We saw him from a good distance back, so we were able to slow down and get a really good look. He did not appear to be full grown, but he wasn't a baby either. He was actually kind of cute, with his shiny black fur and his ears and snout and everything. As we slowed down, he saw us looking at him, which caused him to become shy all of a sudden, and he scampered away. It was really cool.

After this bearxperience, I decided to do a little internet bearsearch, and I discovered some fun facts. Bearhold:

1) Male and female black bears cannot tolerate each other's company except to breed. Interesting. These two must just be friends.

2) Cubs are raised in single-bearent families; father bears do not help with everyday bearcare. This makes sense, because as we have learned, the moms and dads cannot bear to be around each other.

3) Mother black bears are notoriously protective of their cubs, who stay with their mothers for about two years. Awww.

4) Despite their name, black bears can be blue-gray or blue-black, brown, cinnamon, or even (very rarely) white.

5) Black bears are not true hibernators. During their winter dormant period, though, they do not eat, drink, or go to the bearthroom.

6) Black bears are generally shy and secretive and usually fearful of humans. However, if they regularly find food near houses and areas of human activity, they can lose their fear of humans. Unlike grizzly bears, black bears are seldom aggressive toward humans.

I hope you all have found this beary interesting.