Monday, February 16, 2009

Drive down memory lane

So a friend of mine got a new car this past weekend, and as we were talking about the nice shiny new car, it got me thinking about an old familiar car in my past. The Sable.

The Sable was my college car, that my Dad gave me my freshman year at Auburn. It was a 1991 Mercury that came into my life in 1999. It taught me a lot about life, gratitude, and most importantly, humility. You see, there were six of us kids, and Dad believed that, when it came to vehicles, we only needed something to get us around. We could have a nice car when we got a job and could buy it ourselves. This produced some fun cars for the brood... the Pumpkin, the Silver Bullet, the Rosewood, the Roach....

I have pics of the Sable of course... in fact I have one framed in my office right now. Unfortunately I have none on my computer. BUT I found this photo on the internet that is a reasonably accurate depiction. Behold.



Here are some fun facts about the Sable:

1. It had been totaled at least once. My dad, being in the automotive paint and body repair industry at the time, saved it from a premature journey to the scrap heap and had his guys put it back together with scrap parts and Bondo.

2. It was silver... mostly. The rear door on the passenger side was a distinctly different color. To be fair, it was in the same general color family as the rest of the car, but that particular shade was clearly the result of some guesswork in the paint booth. I suspect my Dad used this car as a training tool for some new employee. Way to kill two birds with one stone, Dad - I didn't need my car to look cool or normal or monochromatic! Whatevs!

3. After firing her up, I could completely remove the keys from the ignition and the car would continue to operate as though they never left. Sometimes they just fell out.

4. Due to a few mysterious stains on the seats, I installed luxurious furry black and white faux cow seat covers on the front and rear seats. These were financed by several successful "cow seat collection drives" which were also known as keggers at our apartment junior year, during which people would literally put money in a big cylindrical container (generously donated and decorated by Kristin's stepmom) that said "Cow Seat Collection Drive." By my senior year, the cow seats had made the Sable famous around town. The cow seats were the one cool thing about the Sable. I would park that b*tch right there on the sorority hill, among the beamers and the shiny new SUVs, and it could be proud, because of the cow seats.

5. I had luxurious big furry dice on the rearview to go with the seats. During football season I attached a tiger tail to the trunk, and I had some nice Auburn and University of Margaritaville (from spring break in Key West) decals sprucing up the rear window.

6. It was huge, like a big beautiful silver/gray barge with cow seats. I could fit seven people in the Sable, and did regularly, once for the five-hour road trip (with traffic) to Tuscaloosa and back for the 2000 Iron Bowl. All the luggage fit easily in the giant trunk. We all leaned forward, and we were off! Kristin rode the whole way with furry dice in her face and didn't complain at all (riiiiight).

7. The speedometer only went up to 85. Literally, that was the highest number on the speedometer, located all the way at the end, as though the Mercury factory folks felt exceeding that speed was unthinkable. Truthfully, in the Sable it was, because if you went over 63, it started to shake.

8. The odometer was so far over 100,000 that it had completely started over, and if you didn't know better, you'd think it had normal mileage for an 8,9, 10-year-old car. Really, it was that number plus 100,000.

9. Once someone rammed into it while it was innocently parked at my apartment complex, destroying one of the headlights. I drove it home, and my dad took me out to a real live scrap yard. I watched as he pried a headlight off a Ford Taurus from the same era, and had one of his guys hook the wires up. It worked, but it didn't exactly fit, so he wrapped white masking tape around it and told me not to drive too fast, or it would go flying off. It stayed like that for the rest of the time I had it, which was at least a year, probably more.

10. It was ok to make fun of the Sable. I was cool with it. Meg called it the Disable, and that caught on.

11. The Sable finally died in the parking lot of Varsity Tans in Auburn, about three months before I graduated. I put that baby into reverse, and well, nothing happened. Apparently the transmission blew, and the thousand or so it would have cost to fix it totaled the whole car. April had to come pick me up and I cried for days. My Dad really came through for me, sending up my mom's 1997 Bonneville on a tow truck and towing the Sable away. It was a sad day.

12. This is what succeeded the Sable, and what I drove throughout law school. Thar she blows! Seriously, though, I felt like I was driving a Bentley - it was so great.
Haha - people don't wonder why I bought a brand new convertible after I landed my first job out of law school. These cars were blessings though, because without them I would have been stranded all the time. They were really life lessons on wheels, because I learned that cars are really just cars, and you should impress people with who you are, not what you have, and finally, that fancy sporty shiny new cars don't make you cool - cow seats do.

Sable - wherever you are - this Bud's for you.

13 comments:

meg said...

i love this! god bless the sable. also, i remember like it was yesterday kristin riding shotty with those damn dice in her face...and complaining every quarter mile or so...

nikki webb said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I am laughing out loud remembering how Dad would so lovingly handle our car problems. I remember when I mentioned in passing that I should learn how to drive a stick. His Answer? A "spruced-up" Nissan sentra to replace my beloved Phantom (the Protoge you abused by calling Roach). That nissan was bare bones, my friend. Not even automatic STEERING and it started clicking when you pressed the gas and squeaking if you got into 4th gear. In front of him I called it Cricket, behind his back I called it my Coffin. You forgot to mention how ANGRY he would get when one of these pieces of ...fine automotive craftmanship...broke down.

Amy said...

LOL Disable! That is awesome! What a great post, Bets!

I'm not sure if I remember this correctly, but I think that Nikki's first car (protege?) came from the body shop also, and it used to have something written on the top of the windshield like "U know U want it" !! LOL you could kind of make out the words at a certain angle.

Well my parents bestowed Jeff with a GOLD superbeetle (so like 1976 maybe?) which kept busting a fuel line, leaving Jeff in stranded in very strange situations, and Dad tried to make ME drive a two tone brown VW Van, hippie style. Cara had an entirely manual Escort - and Ryan bitches about driving the Saturn - give me a break! The worst you can say about it is that you have to roll up the windows by hand.

Then again, Dad just bought a new pickup (used) last week and he still has not progressed to the automatic locks OR windows. I kinda don't get why he bothered to buy a new (used) car! Maybe it just smells better than the truck he got back from Jeff, which had sticky floorboards from spilled mountain dews. Seriously, there was change stuck to the floor.

Betsy said...

Meg - I love how you also remember Kristin's frequent dice complaints so vividly. I like how I refused to let her take the dice down. "NO - THE DICE STAY UP!" Hahahahah

It occurred to me that I forgot to mention the cow print steering wheel cover. How could I overlook that?

Nikki - I forgot also to mention Maria's Mazda 323 - the Ragin' Raspberry! You press the gas, and five minutes later, you go somewhere....

Ashley said...

Classic! This made my morning. LOL

Kristin said...

O.k., o.k., I complained "slightly" people. You would too after a VERY LONG weekend of drinking BUDWEISER and eating Carolyn Adams' cookies!!!!!! Why did I eat and drink stuff like that and weigh twenty pounds less??? It isn't fair! Great post BETS!

Anonymous said...

I think I'll call the waaaambulance!
Let me remind you, Bets, that I had NO car in college. Yes, my dear little sister, twas I who WALKED to many places - or worse mooched rides from drunk people. At least I never had to fear a DUI. The worst that could have happened was I could have been "pulled over" for a WUI - Walking under the influence. I literally remember walking through a drive through and ordering - or trying to order (I think they made us go inside.) Hmmmm I'm sure I wasn't drunk at all on that night.

But thanks for the shout out to the Ragin' Raspberry - that sweet ride was post college graduation, and yes I paid for that little gem and the insurance to go with it, my friend.

So the Sable taught you lessons - just as walking taught me some - mainly that walking still doesn't undo too much beer and late night pizza. Sorry my lesson isn't as deep or as philosophical as yours - but useful none the less.

P.S. Nikki, only you called it the "Phantom" the rest of us called it the "Roach."

April said...

i also remember you and the sable coming to toomer on my 21st bday and a bunch of us piling in to buy my first six pack (legally). aw, the sable...miss that girl!

Unknown said...

Wow, this may top the list as my fave blog. My first car was a little red Neon with a speedometer that would randomly drop to zero and stop working. This blog brought back some fond memories. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

YAY! The Sable!! I love memory lane posts...When can we talk about the Zack Morris cell phone that could be heard ringing across the crowded bar at Bodega? And you are right, your cow seats were legendary on that campus. I admit I used to covet them...

Betsy said...

Jennifer, you know you coveted the phone too... that really may need to be my next post. hahaha

Holly Amburgey said...

April - I think I was in the car with you for the fun purchase. Betsy, I loved the sable. It was nice and roomy.

Kristin said...

April, I was also in the car....what a great night! :)